Happy Halloween

October 31, 2006 at 11:54 PM | Site/Personal | No Comments

Happy Halloween!

Too Easy

October 26, 2006 at 7:15 AM | Site/Personal | No Comments

I had a dream that my hair was grown out again. I liked it.  Alas, it was but a dream.

I Just Pulled a Natalie Portman… Again

September 5, 2006 at 12:46 AM | Site/Personal | 1 Comment

This time, I am going to be donating to Locks of Love, for the kids.

The Parking Ticket

August 5, 2006 at 10:53 PM | Site/Personal, Wichita | No Comments

My mom calls me up yesterday, told me that she just got some notice in the mail from the city of Wichita’s municipal court, which said that I had an outstanding parking ticket. I was like “… but I haven’t been in Wichita for… months.” The date that the supposed incident occured was 7/13. I was most definitely not in Wichita on that day. Unless somebody came and got my car while I was at work (it was a Thursday), drove down to Wichita, got a parking ticket, and then promptly returned my car before I noticed that it was even gone.

The more logical explanation for it could be the fact that those fools got the blasted tag number mixed up–my tag number has an “L” in it… the one on the ticket is an “I.” Yes, somebody done messed up.

So now I gotta call them up on Monday and try and get the whole thing sorted out. It’s only a $20 ticket, but it’s the fucking principal of the matter and I’ll be damned if I pay anything. And it’s a pretty hardcore notice too… it’s all like “failure to pay this citation could result in a warrant being issued for your arrest.” Yeah… I can’t be having that right now. Or ever, really.

Update: I called them up and got the ticket voided, without much hassle.  Hooray.

Screwed

July 27, 2006 at 11:01 PM | Site/Personal | 1 Comment

I went over to the gym after work today. When I parked, I thought the steering wheel felt kind of funny. So I got out, went over to the passenger’s side of the car and took a look at my tires. Clear as day on my rear tire was the head of what I can only imagine to be a screw. Who knows what the size of said screw was? Only the head was visible. The tire was not completely flat, but it was definitely on its way. How does a screw get lodged into a tire anyway? A nail, I could understand, but a screw? Wouldn’t you have to actually screw that in? I dunno.

I was able to cautiously take it to the nearby Sam’s Club to get it fixed but they said that they were booked for the rest of the day. I decided to leave my car there for the night. Fun stuff.

Rubber Ducky, You’re The One

July 8, 2006 at 3:47 PM | Food, Random, Site/Personal | 2 Comments

The Green DuckAll I could think about was getting a head of lettuce. The salad that I would make with it would be amazing. I’d cut some mushroom slices in it, some carrots, tomatoes, banana pepper slices, sprinkle a little shredded cheese on it, shake some coarse-ground black pepper in it. Some of that zesty Italian dressing. Amazing.

It was a different story when I got to Wal-Mart, though. I went straight to the vegetable section, looking for the lettuce. I walked up and down that aisle maybe 2, maybe 3 times. Where was it? They’d been known to move stuff around their vegetable aisle before, so I suspected something similar had happened here. But it was simply nowhere to be found. I finally gave up and got ahold of the nearest Wal-Mart employee.

“Um… excuse me, this may sound a little strange, but I can’t seem to be able to find the lettuce. I mean, am I missing something here, where’s the lettuce at?”

“We’re out of lettuce.”

“Ooooh good, because I thought that I might’ve been going crazy. Thanks.” And I stepped away.

I wasn’t the one going crazy–it was Wal-Mart that was going crazy. Wal-Mart, the biggest retailer in the world, was out of lettuce. Who lets their store run out of a staple food item like lettuce just run out? It’s so ridiculous, I’m not even going to try to come up with anything to compare it with. Oh wait, something just came to mind. It’s like that time I went to Chipotle and they were out of rice. Oh yeah, you’d better believe it. It’s like that, only about 10 times worse.

The one item that I really wanted to buy was out. This caught me so off guard that I wasn’t able to finish my grocery shopping with any sort of focus. I had no idea what I was going to buy or what to make with the things that I would buy. I just bought a bunch of random things. Things that I never buy.

Like I threw this stalk of celery into the cart. I don’t even like celery. And then I picked up a cheap bottle of hot sauce that claimed on the bottle that it was “muy salsa.” I asked Albert (who’d taken Spanish for the better part of his life) what that meant, since I was under the impression that salsa was a noun. He didn’t know. “Eh, whatever,” and I put it in the cart. I bought a can of chickpeas. I don’t even know what chickpeas are… I just seen Rachael Ray using them to make some kind of a stuffed cucumber one time and it looked like a lot of fun.

At some point, I came across this green rubber duck sitting on top of some boxes near the juice section. I put it in the cart because it was all cute and abandoned looking, clearly in a place that it did not belong. Just how did it get there? I imagined a small girl, riding in a shopping cart, somehow snagging this duck off of a shelf while her parents were looking at something else. It wasn’t until this child’s oblivious parents were near the juice section, all the way across the store, that they realized that little Suzy had possession of a green rubber duck, at which point the duck was promptly ripped from her grasp and placed atop of some random boxes. Little Suzy cried and cried. And now I had the very same duck riding around in my cart.

And then I went back by the produce aisle to pick up some kind of a lettuce substitute. I was determined to have that salad one way or another. This is when I came across some packages of “green leaf lettuce.” At this stage in my life, I’ve really only dealt with iceberg lettuce, so I was a little skeptical at first, but I bought one anyway. But now that I’ve had it, I don’t think I can go back. Iceberg still has its uses, though.

And I bought some unlabeled peppers from the produce shelves. It’s always a gamble buying produce that is “obscure” enough to be unlabeled. Now, I knew that I was buying banana peppers and serrano peppers, but more often than not, the people working the registers are clueless. They rang both of them up as jalapeños. I was thinking “yesssssss” because jalapeños are about a dollar cheaper per pound. Suckers.

Also, I thought the green duck was kind of a gamble too. I had no idea how much it was going to cost or if it was even in the system. I was really hoping that when they ran the duck’s UPC across their scanner that there would be some kind of a negative-sounding sound and an error message on the display. And then they’d be like “whoa this isn’t even in our system… here just take it.” And then the moment of truth came… the cashier picked up the duck, waved it over the scanner and the standard “booop” came out and 1 “Infant Toy” was instantly added to my bill. It was 97 cents.

The Blood

June 17, 2006 at 4:31 PM | Site/Personal, Work | 2 Comments

I gave blood for the first time ever earlier this week.

They had this blood drive thing going on at work and I’ve been around my fair share of blood drives around school and work for a number of years now… but I’ve always just kept my blood to myself and looked the other way. Does that make me a bad person? I don’t know. Maybe. It’s my blood and I’ll give it if I want to. But for whatever reason, when I saw the announcement of a blood drive coming to our workplace gym about a week ago, I jumped at the opportunity and signed right up. I’m not really sure what prompted me to do so, but I figured… hey, I’ve kept my blood to myself for way too long. It’s time I share some of it with the world–people who may need it more than I do. Why not? I went into the thing with a “whatever” kind of attitude.

The sign up time slots were in 15 minute chunks, which I thought was a little short. I blocked off an hour on my calendar just in case. I was glad that I did, because I think it all took about an hour and a half when all was said and done. Not because it actually took an hour and a half to get a pint of blood from me, but because of all the paperwork and process involved.

I showed up at the gym and there was 8 people already giving blood and 4 or 5 other people waiting. They entered all of my information into their systems and had me fill out some forms and wait some more. And then they had me sit in this booth where they reviewed my forms and took a drop of blood from my finger to test its iron level and took my blood pressure. It was all within normal ranges so it was all good. What wasn’t all good was one of the questions on the history form that I had filled out. One of the questions on there was a yes or no question asking whether I had been outside of the U.S. or Canada in the past 3 years. I had to answer yes because I had indeed been outside of the U.S. during the winter of 2004.

So they asked me about details. I told them that I was in Japan, Hong Kong, and the Phillippines for about a month total. They didn’t have a problem with Japan or Hong Kong but the Phillippines was a little questionable. They broke out this big binder filled with yellow pages listing all of the different places in the world which could potentially disqualify you from donating blood. I told them that I had arrived in Mania (which was OK) and then took a boat down to Mindoro (which had some Malaria issues) so they had to bust out a world atlas, call over other people, who in turn had to make phone calls to faceless individuals to determine whether I was still qualified. Now, I told them that I had taken the pills for malaria resistance while I was there, but apparently they didn’t care. So about an hour in, while they were still waiting on the final word, the girl on the phone pressed the phone on her chest and turned and asked me where I was born. I was like, “Wichita, Kansas.” And then she went back to talking on the phone, “oh nevermind, you don’t have to look that up… he’s a U.S. citizen.” I was like “what…” because they had just wasted all this time when they could have just asked me whether I was a U.S. citizen right off the bat.

So I went and got some apple juice and waited some more until one of the chairs opened up. While I was waiting, somebody who had just finished donating came over and was telling me about this other guy who was just lying down off in the other side of the gym, who I guess turned all pale when he was donating earlier and caused quite a scare. I couldn’t see his face from where I was sitting but he had a (presumably empty) styrofoam cup leaning up against him on the chair. I was like “yeah, there’s no guarantee that I won’t turn out like that.” And it was true… I’ve never done this before so how would I know whether I was one of those people who pass out during blood donation from loss of blood, just at the mere sight of blood, at the sight of the needle, or all of the above. No idea.

When one opened up, it went pretty quickly. They sat me down in this lawn chair/cot looking thing that had an arm rest on one side, cleaned my arm with this iodine soaked swabs, put my arm in one of those blood pressure arm pumps, and gave me this ball to squeeze. Sitting all around me were people with tubes coming out of their arms, blood a-flowing, which led to these pouches next to the chairs.

And then they placed some kind of a paper on my shoulder and took out the needle. I was like “oooh my goddd,” because it was a lot bigger than what I had imagined or expected.

The woman doing all this prep work was like “oh, first time?”

“Yeah.”

“You sure you don’t want to look away?”

“Nah, I want to see it all.” There is something sick about me that made me want to see everything that went down. Maybe it was just curiosity. Maybe it was out of fear. Maybe I get a kick out of seeing that kind of thing. I dunno. I just knew that I wanted the full experience. I fixed my gaze on the tip of the needle and followed it.

“Alright…” and then she proceeded to stick the needle into my inner elbow, where a vein was supposed to be, my eyes following the tip the entire time until it disappeared into my arm. I say “supposed to be” because I sure as hell couldn’t tell where this mythical vein that they sought was. But they’re professionals. Maybe they saw something that I didn’t. Upon entry of the needle, a moderate squirt of blood shot up and out onto my arm, slightly above the entry point.

Again, I was like “ooh my goddddd” because I didn’t expect a squirt. But I guess I should have seen it coming, considering the bib that I had on. But the tube that the needle was attached to remained clear. The woman called some other worker over for help, who proceeded to wriggle the needle around in my arm. I had a needle stuck in my arm so I really wasn’t in any position to make any sudden movements. I didn’t know what was going on or what to expect but i guess this wasn’t supposed to be one of the steps. And then all of a sudden the tube filled with warm blood. I saw them mentally high-five each other. It was all pretty traumatizing for me to see this go down.

They had me squeeze this ball for 5 seconds, release for 5 seconds, and repeat. I did this for about 10-15 minutes when my bag of blood filled up. They labeled the pouch of blood, took the needle out and put a bandage on me. Somebody walked me back over to the refreshments and I had some apple juice, Sprite, and a pack of Nutter Butter, put on a sticker that read “Hug me, I gave blood today”, hung out for a bit talking with some other donors, and then went back to work. It was all so easy.

On my way back, I realized that I had just been jipped. They didn’t even tell me what blood type I had. And that was one of the contributing factors of why I did it.

Amelia

May 29, 2006 at 10:52 PM | Site/Personal | 2 Comments

… is the name of Larry and Tamiko’s baby girl. Congratulations!

Moved In

May 11, 2006 at 2:03 AM | Nerd, Site/Personal | No Comments

So I’m moved in to the house, for the most part. I still have a lot of unpacking, organizing, rearranging to do, but it’s almost all here. On the downside, however, my computer is pretty much dead. It boots up mistaking my CPU for one that is a full gigahertz slower than it really is and then proceeds to overheat in about 15 minutes. That’s probably why you may not have seen me online much.

Sewing Buttons

May 5, 2006 at 1:53 AM | Food, Random, Site/Personal | 1 Comment

It’s official. I’m going to be doing a lot of sewing in the near future. I just did a load of laundry yesterday and I don’t know if I just don’t have enough experience with that task or what, but I lost no fewer than 5 buttons in the dryer. Wow. And here I thought that I had a hang of it all, having done laundry for a number of years now… but I guess I still have much to learn about the complex world of taking clothes from a washer and putting them into a dryer. Either that or my dryer’s some kind of a shirt mangling beast.

I never mentioned this one, but a couple weeks back, I sewed on my very first button ever onto one of my shirts. It too had come off from a bout with the dryer. I didn’t really think too much about it, I just figured that it was that button’s time to go or something. And it just so happened that I had a handy travel sewing kit among a bunch of other random stuff in my room. Trouble was, it didn’t have any needles. I actually had to take a trip out to Wal-Mart to buy a thing of sewing needles. No wait, I remember that night. I bought those needles after hitting up Granfalloon’s… with Wal-Mart just across the street, it would have been foolish of me not to take care of some very necessary shopping at 2 in the morning. So I went and picked up: 1 pack of assorted sewing needles, a 99 cent XXL chimichanga, and three bottles of spices (cinnamon, garlic powder, onion powder). I ate that chimichanga the very same night and it hit the spot. I think I might have made some scrambled eggs too. I dunno, whatever I made, it hit the spot.

The morning after, I googled for pages that could show a person with zero button sewing experience how it could be done. I found this page and this page, which I found quite helpful. The operation was a complete success and I felt an incredible sense of achievement, much like the time I marvelled over my superb mechanical prowress/automotive know-how after fixing my car’s windshield wiper.


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